The Great Silence

BEFORE THE FALL

Ian (off camera): Yeah!  I can’t believe I was invited to write another article either!  Jesus fu…oh!  Hello there!

Nuv: You again?

Ian: Ignore him. Do I have a story to tell you!

Nuv: Is this going to be another rant about…

Ian: (pointing) WHAT’S THAT?

Nuv: (turns around) Huh?

>WHACK<
>THUD<

Ian: One dick out of the way, let’s move on to the next…

THE PROSPECT OF A FRESH START

Ian: So anyways I had this erection for over four hours and the television is always telling me that if that happens, I need to consult my doctor. So, I call my man Johnny Hat Horn Ph.D. and he’s all “Viagra? Cialis?” and I’m all “Naw. Darwyn Cooke’s art in the double-sized Jonah Hex #50.”

That, he told me, is going to take longer than four hours to correct.

Because once you’ve seen, you can’t un-see. That’s the rub. And what I’ve seen in this issue is friggin’ crazy!  Man alive! The writing team of Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti really nailed this one to the cross. I’ve always shied away from this series because the title character is just too ugly, but with writing this good, I might just have to reconsider.

HEY. YOU. If Darwyn Cooke isn’t in your list of top five artists, you are probably not doing it right.  And by “it” I mean “using your eyes and brain.” Cooke’s style in this issue is apparently an homage to Moebius’s classic western comic, ‘Blueberry’. The art is still very much his own, but with a thinner pencil line and a more rustic feel – the ink lines even occasionally pop right out of the boxes.

Being a bigger fan of Cooke’s gals than his fellas, I was definitely more impressed with any page involving Tallulah Black and that’s even including the double-splash horseback shoot-out at the beginning and the Gatling gun killing spree that happens later.

As with most comics worth looking at, Dave Stewart’s colours really are the unsung heroes on this one.  His brown and blue desert tones are much more vivid than you would expect, and the blues and greys giving way to yellows and oranges perfectly represent the changing of the seasons. Once I met Dave Stewart and was all, “Half of these artists wouldn’t be where they are without your colour and shading.”  And you know what he said to me?  “Uh, thanks.”  BAD ASS ALL THE WAY DAVE.

YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU’LL GET

Anyway, this review is running long.  Right now your status is set to CHUMPY (like that sack of rocks, Nuv), but don’t worry, you can fix that for the low, low price of $3.99 at your local comic book store. Until next…

Nuv: Ahem.

Ian: (slowly turns) Umm..WHAT’S THAT?

Nuv: This!

>POW<
>THUD<

Nuv: Ha ha! I threw that shit before I walked in the room!
Oh. You’re still here.
…since Ian’s a ball hog in all senses of the word, I’ll keep this short.

For more Darwyn Cooke, check out his run on ‘The Spirit’ (#1-12), the graphic novel ‘Parker,’ and his crowning achievement, ‘DC: The New Frontier’. They will F your other comics in the A.

For other Jonah Hex highlights, track down issues #16 & 17 with art by Phil Noto and starring Ian’s girl Tallulah Black,  #33 where Darwyn Cooke first popped in, and #35 with art by JH Williams III, the undisputed master of panel layout in comic books.

Hex is only marginally uglier than Ian and way cooler. Do yourself a favor: get a sack, then get Jonah Hex #50. (Best served cold)

Put two in the air…

–The Big Two

NEXT ISSUE: DELAYED FROM THIS WEEK DUE TO DOUCHE-BAGGERY AND A DOUBLECROSS…
THE FIRST INSTALLMENT OF RIDDLE ME THIS!
TUNE IN: SAME IAN-TIME, SAME NUV CHANNEL…