Inspired by Piggy Seldon’s Music To My Eyes, I decided to go the opposite direction. With three music-movie hybrids perched in the queue (’Soul Power‘, ‘This Is It‘ and ‘It Might Get Loud‘), I thought I’d share my thoughts on some I’ve already seen. ‘Cause I’m generous. Check it:
Dave Chappelle’s Block Party (2006) – Dave-o assembled a line-up of artists he’d wanna see for an outdoor concert in Brooklyn. Combining scenes of the build-up to the concert, the concert itself and various other weird/hilarious incidents (like the Broken Angel House and it’s weird-tard occupants), Chappelle scored one more hit before going cuckoo and disappearing off the face of the earth. Not that it matters. He’s rich, biotch!
Belly (1998) – If puke could puke and Hype Williams documented it, you’d have this cold bowl of ass. It looks amazing but is unbelievably, never-endingly, offensively awful and unintentionally funny. Much like all of my pre-Miss Teen USSR conquests.
Fade To Black (2004) – The ‘farewell’ concert that accompanied Jay-Z’s ‘farewell’ LP, ‘The Black Album.’ Since then Jay-Z and Brett Favre revealed that, in addition to being among the best in their respective rackets, they’re liars. Or they still have stuff to teach us. One or the other. Anyways, the film mixes show footage from a sold-out Madison Square Gardens show with the making of the album, from beat selection to recording, giving us such highlights as Rick Rubin’s living room bison (yep) during the recording of 99 Problems. Also watch for the scene where Jay goes to get a beat from Timbaland. Bananas and milk have never made me laugh this hard before or since.
Tougher Than Leather (1988) – Rick Rubin. Russell Simmons. The Beastie Boys. Slick Rick. Run-DMC. Together they form: Megacrap. Seriously some of the worst acting ever committed to film. How this slipped out of their cheeks and into the public eye without anyone sane putting a stop to it is beyond me. I guess Def Jam was blind too.
Purple Rain (1984) – If you removed the musical elements, you’d be left with a sparkly log of shit in a blouse. Luckily, said steaming pile is accompanied by (pound-for-pound) the best soundtrack ever (or at least since The Beatle’s movies), Prince and The Revolution performing all of the songs at the height of their musical powers, Prince wearing a Zorro mask fashioned from women’s undergarments, Apollonia’s scenery-chewing dialogue tits and the cocaine-fueled comedy tornado that is Morris Day. All swagger and sleaze, he steals the show whenever he’s on screen just as Prince does whenever he’s on stage. Slammin’!
Under The Cherry Moon (1986) – Aaaaannnddd…the flip side of Prince rears it’s strange head. With the success of ‘Purple Rain’ giving the diminutive perv the power to do whatever he wanted, he hit us with a black and white, jazz-era, Fellini/Abbott & Costello rip-off period piece set in Paris, about a preening (possibly gay) gigolo who’s preening (possibly gay) sidekick is…ah, who cares. Point being: Prince hams it up in a way that is really funny. To himself. Also features the paint-drying debut of boring-ass Kristin Scott Thomas. I guess, for her, the only direction from here was up. Prince, unfortunately, still had a ‘Graffiti Bridge‘ to cross…
Idlewild (2006) – Outkast star in (and soundtrack) an uneven but entertaining 1920s-era tale of two musicians in an underground jazz club run by some bad mammajammas. Big Boi is a boisterous, fast-talking hustler-type. Andre is an introverted mortician’s son. A perfectly average day in Outkast-ville.
The House Party Series (1990-1994) – Kid N Play dodge parents, bullies and normal haircuts while throwing a quiet tea party with some good friends. Nope! The shit is loud as shit and there ain’t no tea up in that motherf@#$er neither! Just Martin Lawrence, the late Robin Harris, some fly hoes and some kick-each-other’s-feet dance moves! While I love the first one, the next two are increasingly crummy. Part 2 involves a ‘Pajama Jam’ theme though, so we’ll split the difference.
8 Mile (2002) – Owing equally to ‘Purple Rain’ and ‘Rocky,’ Eminem delivered an excellent, understated performance and won an Oscar for the song of his life. Those aren’t even the highlights. Depicting the bloodsport that is competitive freestyle battling, 8 Mile shed light on one of my favorite parts of the hip hop culture, while showcasing the microphone beast within Mr. Mathers. Proper!
Almost Famous (2000) – More like Almost Anus. Oh, wait. I was thinking of the rest of Kate Hudson’s career. My bad. This movie’s fucking awesome. I’m not even going to talk about this shit, cause you have all already seen it. Right? [Editor’s Note: The last word was said through grit teeth and with menacing fist shake.]
The Doors (1991) – The best biopic of all time. Oliver Stone takes hallucinogens and gets behind the camera, detailing the rise and fall of The Lizard King. Uh, and the other guys too. Debates about it’s accuracy aside, no one can argue the power of the lead performance. Now when people picture Jim Morrison, they see Val Kilmer’s face instead. Ride the snake, slaves!
Now you do some work, you lazy goats! Hit up the Comments section with your music-movie highs and lows.
At ease,
– Nuv
“If you removed the musical elements, you’d be left with a sparkly log of shit in a blouse. ” hahahahahahahaha it’s funny cuz it’s true!
Yes, “sparkly log of shit in a blouse.” Thank you for a great long laugh.