For those just tuning in, DC relaunched their entire universe with 52 new #1 issues (both in print and with day-and-date digital editions) and The Big Three (Ian, Nuv and guest/hostage Mark Campbell) are running the gauntlet of reading/reviewing ALL OF ‘EM! Need to read the previous instalment? Follow the link below…
WEEK 2 CONTINUED…
Animal Man #1 by Jeff Lemire, Travel Foreman and Dan Green
Mark: Holy shit. This book was fantastic. Creepy as all get out. As soon as I finish writing these reviews for my slave driver, er… for Nuv, I’m e-mailing my LCS and having Animal Man added to my pull list.
Nuv: Awesome! Lemire’s story is perfect. Travel Foreman’s art is kinda love it or hate it. His trippy sequences involving A-Man using his powers are the highpoint, and more of those in future issues will remove the one blemish on this title. If you tried to remove the blemishes from this column, I’d be the only one left here writing, fo’reals!
Ian: You know how I can tell my buddy at the local comic shop is on drugs? He swore to me over and over that Animal Man was the best comic in the New DCU so far. Did you watch that train-wreck show called “No Ordinary Family”? That was one case of why you should never mix family with comics. This is another.
Nuv: You should never mix your family with ANYTHING. Halt the genetic tomfoolery that is the Explosivo family tree, here and now. FOR THE SAKE OF ALL OF OUR EYES!!
Justice League International #1 by Dan Jurgens and Aaron Lopresti
Ian: First page, BOOM! FAIL! I don’t really like anything involving Booster Gold or the DC Universe C-listers (and Batman so you’ll buy the book!), so this comic is a bit of a conundrum for me. On one hand, it sucks. On the other hand, they so brazenly ripped off Marvel’s Sentinels I can’t get my shit together.
Mark: Booster Gold feeling insecure, Guy Gardner storming out, Batman sneaking in, female characters standing around… yeah, this book had it all. If “it all” means everything I needed to see to know to ignore future issues. I wish I’d followed that same instinct after my first column with you morons…
Nuv: Jurgens again? Shee-it! Look Daniel-san: nobody gives a shit about the “International” aspect of JLI. It was known for Beetle, Booster and “Bwah-Ha-Ha.” If you’re not going to give us two of those three things, and you’re going to stick the one you do give us in a shitty, overly bulky new costume, just name it something else. Let’s see… unnecessary bulk, the opposite of funny… how about JLIW: Justice League Ian’s Writing?
Men of War #1 by Ivan Brandon and Tom Derenick
Ian: I remember back when Viking came out, Ivan Brandon’s writing didn’t make any goddamn sense whatsoever, but these days he can really rock a typewriter. FFWD>> to Men of War where the story is coherent and the art is super sweet and there’s a nifty little back-up story to (army) boot. So there you have it!
Mark: No. You have it. The main story here worked well enough as an introduction, but there needs to be more substance in future issues. What we got here was like the smell of dinner wafting in from the kitchen. I want to be able to actually dig in and get to the meat of it. The back up was alright, but nothing special. Just like you two.
Nuv: War is hell. Comic is surprisingly good. Give a bitch a chance, give a dog a bone. Know’m’sayin’?
Mark: Nobody knows what you’re saying.
Nuv: Who asked you, Soft Serve?
Mark: You did, dumbass.
Ian: Ha! It’s true! Fuck you with facts, Nuv!
Nuv: Fax?
Ian: FACTS, MOTHERFUCKER! FACTS!
Nuv: Huh. Just so you guys out there know, Mark paused and put on sunglasses when he delivered that “You did” like he’s David Caruso and shit…
OMAC #1 by Dan Didio and Keith Giffen
Mark: If you are not a fan of Jack Kirby’s work for DC, then this book is not for you. This book is not for me. I’m a little surprised they didn’t call the series “OMAC Smash.”
Nuv: Looks exactly like Kirby. Which is a plus, in a retro-throwback way. The story failed to grab me. Much like every girl Ian’s lured into his brown van. Tiny white man < pepper spray.
Ian: I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE KEVIN WAS OMAC THE WHOLE TIME! Oops…
Static Shock #1 by John Rozum, Scott McDaniel & Jonathan Glapion
Ian: What could possibly be more awesome than learning about electrical theory while reading a comic about a guy floating around on a honeycomb (?) disc and fighting a big ball of zap? Uncles and aunts, buy this for your nephews and nieces for their next birthday.
Mark: I wonder if Virgil/Static has Aspergers? He’s supposed to be a genius, but doesn’t understand why civilians don’t like to be tossed around by superheroes, or have their cars shut down mid-span on a bridge. Anyways… I found this issue to be dull.
Nuv: I literally fell asleep on two different occasions trying to read this. To be fair, the second time was ‘cause I was up all night porkin’ Ian’s mom.
Stormwatch #1 by Paul Cornell and Miguel Sepulveda
Mark: I like that the Martian Manhunter ditches the Justice League for Stormwatch when he wants to get some real work done. Other than that, I didn’t find anything else particularly clever about this book. There certainly wasn’t anything here that hasn’t already been done (and done better) in an Authority book.
Nuv: Yeah, the best part was MM, who’s always been overshadowed and underused in the past. The rest was average. I do like Paul Cornell’s writing though (see his excellent Action run starring Lex Luthor) so, for a chance to see my favourite Martian shine, I’ll keep an eye on it. For now.
Ian: This comic is PRETTY BORING you guys, but under the right circumstances / influences I can see how this the art on a couple of pages could make you trip balls. In summation, Martian Manhunter deserves better.
Swamp Thing #1 by Scott Snyder, Yanick Paquette and Francesco Francavilla
Ian: Remember back when Marvin Gaye wrote “What’s Going On?” and made the environment cool-beans? Well that’s kinda what Snyder’s done here. Go Swamp Thing!
Mark: This issue proved that no one other than Jim Lee can draw the new Superman costume without it looking stupid. Also, see my review for Animal Man and replace all instances of that title with Swamp Thing.
Nuv: Art? Yannick Paquette’s is drop dead gorgeous, and he’s going to be alternating arcs with the also-amazing Francesco Francavilla. Story? Scott Snyder’s script TAKES the torch from the shadow of Alan Moore that hangs over this title. And then hogties the shadow, shaves it’s wiccan beard off, makes it squeal like a pig and apologize to Jason Aaron. Together, they give us a moody, epic beginning, a uniquely conflicted main character, a frighteningly cool bad guy and even cooler-looking creepy cronies (below), and a perfect “together again for the first time” type of ending. Dripping with dread from start to finish, this is a perfect comic book, top to bottom. As much as I loved Justice League and Action, and even Animal Man, Swamp Thing is the one to beat so far.
– The Big Three
