Alright. I’ve seen M.O.P. live, so believe you me, I know from energy and intensity. I haven’t seen more of either from a live performance than I did this past Tuesday when Fortune Sound Club faced the Attack of The Bal-Hedz themselves. Jeez-us! Barring a short interlude with some ‘special guests’ (which I’ll get to later), it was an even 50/50 split between the time their feet were planted on the stage and the time spent in the air. Stik ‘N’ Muve indeed. How they kept their breath is beyond me. Actually, fuck breath. How do they not lose their voices?! You know how raspy and gravelly their delivery is on record? It’s just like that live too, rappin’ their asses off at the top of their lungs for the whole set, every song. But, Holddafucup! I should start at the beginning…
I arrived at Fortune with my camera monkey, Captain Arthritis, in tow [click HERE or on any of the photos in this article to go to his gallery] just in time for second-to-last opener Def3. A Saskatchewan kid that can spit. Well. Accompanied on stage by a dude with a trumpet, he ran through songs of varying speeds without a stumble, flowing nimbly over the beats. The catchiest song of his set was I Can’t Put My Finger On It, but the highlight for me was when he brought his dad on stage, diminutive in stature but towering in style, to help belt out the Spanish chorus. Def’s dad, with his flowing locks and scarf steez, was easily one of the coolest motherfuckers in the club. Old man strength, sons!
“Everybody Wanna Sound Grrrr-i-my!!”
I have to say I was caught off guard when a ski-masked white guy took the stage, took the mic and took control of the crowd, holding our undivided attention hostage. Snak The Ripper. Goddamn! He is a PERFECT fit with Onyx. Growling out his lyrics, he sounds like the hardest motherfucker alive, but if you pay attention to his lyrics, he’s got a cutting sense of humour and, even before he peeled up the ski mask to confirm it, I could tell he was spitting through a knowing smirk. Highlights included the theft-encouraging Take That Shit and Lazy, which he rapped part of from the floor to illustrate his point and contained such gold as “I’m too lazy to rap, I’m too lazy to wipe my ass after I crap.” The set was super-short, though despite the song I just mentioned, I think it was more due to everything running late than Snak being lazy. Anyhow, I gotta say, he lived up to his name. He fuckin’ ripped it! None of that was the best part about Snak though. So what was? THIS FACE! A. Mazing.
“Move Back Motherfuckers! The Onyx Is Here!”
And: the main event. Stepping on stage to the above refrain from the Bacdafucup intro track and dripping with menace (and sweat) from jump, they began their aural assault. The crowd obeyed their every command as if they were brandishing automatic weapons instead of mics. When they launched into Throw Ya Gunz, that’s exactly what we did, putting two in the air and “buck-buck-ing” like we just didn’t have a safe, sheltered upbringing and stable, healthy home lives. Sticky’s lyrical tantrum on the track (“I hate your fuckin’ guts and I hope that you die!”) is even radder when you can see his face. You know, that classic Onyx mean-mug/stink-face thing, where it looks like they just smelled shit? Yeah, THAT face!
Every song was a jolt, like that scene in Pulp Fiction where Travolta stabs the adrenaline needle into Uma Thurman’s heart. From Last Dayz (young ‘uns that don’t remember this one may recognize the beat from the second-to-last battle in 8 Mile) to Shut ‘Em Down (along with Keep It Movin’ and Bring It On, probably the most used song title in Hip Hop), the Terrible Twosome just got better and better.
“But, But, But, But Wait It Gets Worse!!”
Remember those ‘special guests’ I mentioned? It was The Outlawz, those two dudes that used to rap with 2Pac in Thug Life. Well, stick to what you know, I guess. They came out, rode the wave of applause at the mention of ‘Pac’s name and rapped loudly overtop of ‘Pac verses. So basically, the same thing a lot of the crowd probably does at home or while driving around. “Special.” Anyways, it provided me with a perfect window to piss/grab more beer, and gave Starr and Sticky a moment of respite before continuing their unrelenting attempt to do as much damage to their vocal chords as possible.
Their chemistry is ridiculous. Fredro Starr and Sticky Fingaz bounce off each other and finish each other’s sentences like only a duo that’s been joined at the hip for two decades (!) can. Fredro would leave out a word and Sticky would fill it in flawlessly. And I’m not talking the last word of each line (a fairly standard spot for the patented Flavour Flav-style lyrical back-up) I’m talking mid-line! Retarded!
“When Y’all Least Expected It & Thought It Was Safe, Onyx Hit You In The Face!!!”
And finally, the one we were all waiting for: SLAM! This song is one of those instant classics that transcends the group that crafted it and the era it was released in. One of the all-time great rap anthems, mentioned (deservedly) alongside tracks like Hip Hop Hooray and The Choice Is Yours. And it was fucking awesome. I’m pretty sure we (the crowd) did some serious damage to the floor with our jump-spazzing and scream-rapping along. I will say that this song, while the highlight of both the night and their whole career, also brings up my only ‘minus.’ I hadn’t mentioned it to this point, but for those of you that don’t know, Onyx was originally a quartet. One member left after the first album and has passed away since. Fair enough. RIP Big DS. But where the fuck is Sonsee? Truth be told, I always liked Sticky and Starr the best, but when it came to this song, I have to say, Slam just doesn’t feel right without the middle verse. I mean, if I had to lose a verse, I suppose that’s the one to lose. Starr’s opening verse is essential and sets the tone of the whole track, and Sticky’s verse that closes out the song? Come on! It’s the most iconic single verse associated with Onyx. You can’t lose that shit. So I guess this is just nitpicking. I shouldn’t complain. I mean, I got to see, live, from about a foot away, Sticky Fingaz do “…but, but, but, but wait it gets worse!” Somewhere in time, grade 7 me was fist-pumping to no end.
“Getdafucout!”
Look the bottom line is this: I’m old enough to remember when they first burst on the scene, and this show is just the latest in a long line of shows (almost all of them at Fortune, coincidentally) to confirm that with most of those old legends, it’s not the old part that matters. It’s the legend part. Some things never change. Sky is blue. Water is wet. Captain Arthritis’ pinky fingers are complete deformities and abominations of nature. Oh, and “Onyx is heavyweight and still undisputed!”
– Nuv
